As I type, the numbness is squeezing hard.

The only feeling of a known reality: the tears running down my cheeks.

The uncertainty of all that is abruptly highlighted.

All I want: run from it, hide in the dark corners of a warm normality.

There is no normal to be found. No matter where I look.

My choices: face this uncertainty, sit on the edge of this chaos.

Ride out the massive waves of emotion, grow, push through the trauma and find meaning.

My hero, the man who raised, guided, protected, pushed and unconditionally loved me is no more.

Dad has gone.